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True Confessions of an Astrologer/Father 
April 19, 2008 |
| Vedic
Astrology Diary Archives |
By Vaughn
Paul Manley, M.A.
For an astrologer to have a child can be a nerve wracking experience.
At least it was for me. I often set the timing for events like
marriage for others, but this was a birth chart that I had no
control over. It happened to also be the chart that was going
to effect my life the most, which meant that I'd like to try
to have some control over the thing. Wouldn't you?
Before my wife became pregnant I thought that I fully believed
there were no mistakes in the Divine's selection of the birth
time. If she became pregnant I won't even look at an ephemeris
before he's born. It will be absolutely perfect. Right?
Right... Preparing for our child's birth tested my faith to
the max. I teetered on the fence between surrender & trust,
and fear & control on a daily basis it seemed, especially
as we got closer to his due date. There were moments when I
freaked, like when the Moon passed through Aquarius where it
was conjunct Rahu, and opposed Saturn and Ketu. As an astrologer
I witness how powerful the moment of birth is to describe someone's
life. I wanted to have the baby I wanted, but was afraid the
process was like having a box of chocolates and Forrest Gump
was right - you never know what you're going to get. It's one
thing to know that the 5th house in the parent's chart describes
the 1st child, but another to apply it to your own child, and
fully trust in the process.
I needed to surrender, and wasn't doing a very good job of it.
At one point I told my wife "Okay, this weekend you should
drink castor oil to induce labor!" That was the point that
I finally realized how crazy this was. I was trying to play
God, as if I could control his birth time, which is not something
I believe in. This was his birth time after all - his soul's
glorious entrance into the world, and I needed to stop interfering.
At the hospital after seven hours of labor, the doctor gave
us an interesting choice - to either continue to induce labor
or to have a cesarean section. Now it felt as though we really
did have control over when our son was born! My wife and I talked
and prayed about it. We both felt like we should have the c-section,
especially because she was still only 2 centimeters dialated,
which was where she was seven hours earlier! I had the list
of the timing of the ascendants for the day and had memorized
the planets positions. The doctor said we could be in the operating
room by 7:30pm. It intuitively felt right for him to have Virgo
ascendant, so I asked the doctor for a little more time (to
allow for Virgo to rise). They said they couldn't promise anything,
but that they would try, with obvious reluctance. As it turned
out the operating room was delayed anyway.
It was very interesting to have finally come to the place of
surrender by the time we arrived at the hospital and then be
given the choice in the timing of the c-section. Did we actually
have the power to choose his birth time? Or was the whole thing
orchestrated? I believe it was orchestrated and believe every
birth is as well.
A happy father and son - baby Jai
In the end, after it was over, I could have saved
so much mental energy to have just relaxed into the process.
It came down to trusting that
our son's karma, even if it was challenging, would be the best
for his soul's path, and also exactly what my wife and I needed
as well. It turned
out that our son was 9 lbs 14 oz, which is quite large, maybe
too large for my wife to have a vaginal birth. We named him
Jai (and nicknamed him "little Jai-gantic"!).
Copyright 2008. Vaughn Paul
Manley. All Rights Reserved. |
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